When I was younger, I hated playing the game, Never Have I Ever. For those of you who don’t know how the game is played, this covers a brief rundown (before people start adding house rules):
- One person says, “Never have I ever ___________ (insert something they’ve never done)”
- Everyone in the group who has done that thing does something to indicate that they have (typically taking a drink from an alcoholic beverage).
- Those who haven’t done the thing sit quietly while the others in the group explain or don’t (it really depends on the group), but there’s often a lot of oohing and OMGing.
- The game continues until everyone is wasted or someone gets bored enough to start dancing on tables or running around the block naked. (This may indicate that the game has moved onto Truth or Dare).
I hated playing the game in my early years of college because I NEVER GOT TO DRINK ANYTHING. Because everyone liked to throw down the dirtiest things people did, and I was a shy prude. Here are a few nuggets that would have given me ample drinking opportunity prior to attending Bradley University:
Never have I ever…
- Cut a bald spot in my hair
- Eaten cat food
- Lost a board game to a dog
- Gone commando to my high school graduation
- Reenacted the entire movie, The Leprechaun, on the playground
- Sprained my arm falling off the monkey bars
- Refused to eat ranch dressing for more than two decades
- Taken glamour shots
- Dyed my own hair
- Stayed in my sleeping bag when everyone else snuck out from the sleepover
- Kissed a boy in the back seat of a car
- Memorized the lyrics to Bloodhound Gang’s The Bad Touch
- Gone to the teen club without my parents’ permission
- Drank a few sips of alcohol, all while in the presence of my parents
- Had cheer sex
And until my junior year of college, the only thing that really changed was my alcohol consumption. So I hated playing the game. Because I wanted to do more things, and the few things that I had done felt embarrassing to me.
But now, as an adult, I’m proud as fuck of the things that I’ve done. I love playing never have I ever because almost everything I’ve done has been an adventure, even if it was stupid/crazy/insane/ridiculous/horrifying.
Just for reference, a few of my favorites that would cause me to drink:
Never have I ever…
- Seen Stephen King speak (20 feet away from me)
- Gone on vacation by myself
- Gotten married
- Been fired from a job (one I hated)
- Ordered a pizza for delivery while finishing a plate of nachos in a taco joint
- Seen Hamilton performed live in Chicago
- Made out with the same guy as three of my girlfriends
- Gone home with someone on the first date
- Punched a hole in my apartment window because I was mad at my boyfriend
- Smoked my first cigarette after smoking was banned in bars
- Stayed up partying for an entire weekend without sleeping more than 2 hours ( with no drugs involved)
- Gotten lost in France
- Dated a drug addict (or two)
- Threatened to punch a bouncer at my bachelorette party
- Gotten lucky on a golf course
My bucket(list) hath runneth over. And I can’t wait for the next notch on my wall.
What’s on your completed bucket list?
Two things…I’ve totally had cheer sex( never knew it, but I have). And two….Ew….I don’t want to play with you.
You’re so cool!
Never have I ever is still a pretty crap game for me!
I love you! <3