My new favorite word is husband

Heeeeey there, Blog Friends!

I went and got married on you last month, and obviously I’m a brand new lady with a whole new personality. 

I’m lying about that last part. I’m the same me. Just way less stressed than I was during that whole wedding planning bullshit.

Our wedding was magical, and I can’t wait to tell you all about it, but first…let’s talk about how much more awesome the word husband is than boyfriend. 

I’ve been using it a lot on the twitter, and it’s pretty fucking magical.


It feels like using the word, “husband” has more clout than the word boyfriend. Like when we were in a bar in Belgium. Brian was getting drinks at the downstairs bar, and this guy starting hitting on me from across the room. I must have looked super sexy hunting pokemon on my phone or something. When he popped up creepily behind me in the middle of a selfie and asked if I wanted a drink, I told him my husband was getting me one. After an awkward 27 seconds, he walked away. And when Brian returned, I gave him a big ole smooch. 


Honeymoon at versaille

Or when we were in Disneyland Paris, and I went down to breakfast solo and asked to bring a take away box to my husband who slept through breakfast.

Because it’s important to ensure that your spouse is fed and happy. As my husband, it’s Brian’s job to make sure I’m properly fed at all times. I was just trying to return the sentiment.

Apparently, we spent a lot of time and energy on food during our honeymoon.

So far things are off to a good start. Three weeks of marriage, and I think I’ll keep my new husband.

I’m pretty confident I’m doing the wife thing right. I’m really good at being sexy.

Obviously, Brian is incredibly lucky to have me. Hopefully, he likes the word wife as much as I like the word husband.

Hey! Did you know you can buy my book on Amazon? 37 women wrote about the struggle for perfection, and I'm one of 'em. Go check it out!

If Shingles Didn’t Kill Me, Wedding Planning Might…

One month from today, I’ll be waking up next to Brian (um, yes. He’s not allowed to abandon me the night before our wedding, despite the fact that the world thinks he shouldn’t see me before our wedding. And despite the fact that he’s probably going to wake up to a house full of crazy if my family has anything to say about it…) and starting the most magical day of my life to date. You know how my Clark Griswold expectations have already built this up in my mind. Don’t try to fix it.  

But the last nine months have not been without fault. I’ve made LOTS of mistakes in this whole wedding planning process. Even while utilizing the best wedding advice ever, I still managed to stress out internally to the point where it came out in the form of motherfucking shingles. And remember how that advice said not to stress about the details? I just put them off until…well…now…or two weeks from now. Whatever.

Quirky Chrissy Wedding shower

So I’ve made some errors…while drinking a lot of champagne. And enjoying every minute of being engaged (except for the moments people encourage me to use the word, “fiance,” because I really think it’s a douchey word). I thought I’d tell you things you should probably not do (and I’m sure over the next 31 days, there will be a laundry list of more things I’ll do wrong. But you know what? At the end of the day, Brian is marrying Chrissy. And then we’re going to Europe (and don’t try to rob my house, robbers. My brother is moving in for the time we’re gone. And he’s big and scary and mean).

Don’t do what I did

  • I ordered enough invitations to hand one to every. single. man. woman. and child (yes, even the toddlers standing up in my wedding). NO ONE TELLS YOU THAT YOU ONLY NEED INVITATIONS ON A PER HOUSEHOLD BASIS! So I’m telling you. We ordered our invitations from Vistaprint using Ebates for a sweet bonus, but I ordered way too many of them. Luckily, I was able to change my order when I realized my mistake, but they could only give me a big fat credit on VistaPrint to make up for it. So, I’ve pretty much got business cards for life or I might order some cool rando swag. We’ll see.
  • I forgot to stamp envelopes. On both thank you notes from my showers and actual wedding invitations, several came back to us because I didn’t triple check for stamps on everything. Sometimes, the post office is nice to me. Sometimes, it’s not.
  • Speaking of invitations, I also sent several invitations to the wrong or old addresses. Also resulting in envelopes being returned to us.
  • I’m also pretty sure we forgot to send invitations to some people full stop. This was a very hectic time in our lives, and I don’t know how people do this and dear god why didn’t I hire someone to manage the details?!
  • I waited until the last minute to book our hotel rooms. I know that had I booked two months ago, when I booked our flights, I probably could have saved a shit ton more money. But I did work pretty hard to get the best prices I could for the nicest hotels in our price range on TripAdvisor. I’m very happy with our choices. For now. I’ll let you know in October how that worked out for us.
  • I still haven’t picked out music. Like…none of it. Ceremony music. First dance song. The only thing I know for certain is that my dad and I will dance to “Daddy’s Little Girl” because the man has had that planned since before my actual birth. And now it’s like fuuuuuck. I can’t believe I put this off and now I have to make decisions. I hate making decisions. WHY DIDN’T I HIRE SOMEONE TO MAKE DECISIONS?

6 wedding planning mistakes to avoid because no one tells you this stuff.

Well, I know there are more mistakes to be made, so I’m just going to get to making them, and I can’t wait to tell you all about everything! And if you’re getting married…hire someone to manage the details.

Hey! Did you know you can buy my book on Amazon? 37 women wrote about the struggle for perfection, and I'm one of 'em. Go check it out!