How to Turn Your Bathroom Into a Spider Den for Halloween

In the beginning of the Halloween season, Brian and I were discussing our eventual Halloween game plan. I told him we should just buy one big item each year and eventually we will have a full-on haunted house of joy. We also buy an ungodly amount of decorative shit from the dollar store, so there’s no shortage of Halloween hanging around this place…

So I said to him, “Last year, we bought the spider…”

And he said, “And the house…”

“No, Brian…I don’t mean all big budget things…just Halloween stuff. So last year was the spider.”

“And the house.”

Well…I mean…I guess he wasn’t wrong. When one owns a whole house, Halloween can start to go…a little overboard. For us, it was/is the greatest thing EVER. I showed you our creepy dolls of death and destruction in the window where I can’t seem to keep plants alive.

I have a twisted sense of humor, and I think it’s important to make the bathroom absolutely terrifying for guests, because where better to piss your pants? Amiright?

Our downstairs bathroom started out like any normal bathroom...before we turned it into the ultimate Halloween decoration

Now that we have three bathrooms, I can play around a little more. I’ve been planning our downstairs bathroom for months, patiently waiting to get started on my brilliance. You see, we have a bathroom with a shower that is never used, so I was free to use that shower in whatever capacity fit with my Halloween theme. And holy fuck was I ready to bring back my hanging cocoon body wrapped in spider webs…But this time, I was going to turn that entire room into the spiders’ den. It would be my greatest creation.

Spider With Suction CupHairy spiderSoft SpiderPoseable Hairy SpiderPlush 20Remote Control Brown Spider

My original plan was to hang the body from the showerhead and wrap spider webbing all around the area, but it was really hard to see the body. And as the body was the focal point of the entire room, we decided to open the doors and hang the body from the shower door frame. I used bloody spider webs this time, instead of regular webbing for that cool red effect.

This hanging body in the bathroom is surrounded by spider webs for a terrifying and gruesome scene in your bathroom

Then we placed spiders all over the webbing with other bugs wrapped up inside cocoons of spider web as if they had already been captured by the spiders and spun for a late night snack.

Use plastic spiders placed all over the webbing for the ultimate creepy space. Wrap other plastic bugs with webbing as if they were caught by the spiders

When you sit down on the porcelain throne, you almost feel engulfed by the spider webs.

When it comes to Halloween decorations, Quirky Chrissy knows her shit. Click To Tweet

Of course, to add to the atmosphere, we played with lighting a lot this year. We installed red light bulbs, which were surprisingly difficult to find in the stores, in the bathroom light fixtures. My mom suggested we try to find them at Home Depot, and she was correct. Thank God.

Feit Electric Lightbulbs 60W Equivalent Red Spiral CFL Light Bulb BPESL13T/R/HD

Use red lighting to increase the scare factor in your bathroom spider den

And if you remember me mentioning the spider that we ‘invested” in last year? That jumping spider was by far, the piece de resistance. We got the Black Jumping Spider – Animated Decoration at  Spirit Halloween(use code: 20FORU2015 for 20% off), hid him in the back corner of the bathroom behind spider webs.

Use red lighting to increase the scare factor in your bathroom spider den

When everyone was focused on the creepy hanging body, they didn’t notice the cord from the giant spider leading to a step mat (which we paid extra for) hidden under a bathroom rug we found at the Dollar Store. When the spider jumped and screamed, everyone was horrified. I was thrilled to pieces. Screams were frequent and hilarious at our party.

All in all, I think we did a killer job with this bathroom. I think it took the bloody murder scene bathroom to a whole new level.

Turn Your Bathroom Into a Spider Den with a few plastic spiders, spider web and a hanging cocoon body. This little room scared everyone at our annual Halloween party!

What do you think of this one, guys? What ideas do you have for the hanging body? How do you decorate your bathroom for Halloween?

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My Kitchen Window – Where Everything Goes to Die, Including Creepy Baby Dolls

In this year’s edition of Chrissy’s fucked-up Halloween decor…

Dolls are creepy. Like, on a scale of one to terrifying, they top the charts. When I used to work haunted houses, I always wanted to build a room that was all creepy baby dolls. So this year, when I started planning OUR haunted house, I knew that baby dolls would play a role. I would love to have a collection of creepy zombie babies like the one below, but I was on a tighter budget than that would allow.

Zombie Baby DecorSevered Zombie Baby Head PropEvil Baby Prop with KnifeEvil Baby Prop with Teddy BearDemonica The Undead BabySpinning Head Possessed Baby
These guys are all on my dream list. Instead, I thrifted and garage sailed for some of the most terrifying dolls.

I thrifted for creepy dolls that I would use for Halloween

My criteria was simple. I was looking for eyes that stare you down. Dolls with easy-to remove limbs. Talking dolls that say things like “I’m sleepy,” which sounds like “I’m creepy.” Horrifying giggles.

Then, I had to really think about what I wanted to do with them. We all know I’m twisted as fuck when it comes to Halloween. I turned our apartment bathroom into a murder scene. I made a hanging dead body wrapped in spider webs (just wait until I show you what I did with the body this year!) in our stairwell. I love elaborate and disgusting decor. It’s a thing. So I started pinning all the baby dolls to my Halloween party board.

I finally sat down to start painting…and this guy happened.

I ran out of white paint to make this doll more grey/blue...and he turned into a creepy blue zombie babyI used a combination of blue, purple, black and white acrylic paints from my art box to create this ghostly blue color. I wanted to make him a little bit grey/bluer, but I ran out of white paint…and he turned into a creepy blue zombie baby. My friend Lily thought he needed a little more oomph, but I never did get time to add to him…

I was busy working on the other dolls…

I decided to make a lot of bloody, creepy doll parts, using the blue doll as the cannibal leader doll, a few full size dolls and a lot of doll parts.I decided to make a lot of bloody, creepy doll parts, using the blue doll as the cannibal leader doll, a few full size dolls and a lot of doll parts. For the blood, I used crimson red, yellow, and black paints mixed together.

When I sent Lily a text picture asking if I took it too far…she thought it was fantastic and took the thoughts out of my head with additional scene details. Her boyfriend was less impressed.

Halloween texts about creepy baby dolls

Then, it was time to decide where and how I wanted to display these doll parts. I have this really fantastic kitchen window, which is awesome for decorative accents, but terrible for plants (even if that’s what it’s designed for). Mostly, because I did not inherit my mom’s green thumb and I refer to this window as the place where things go to die. Honestly, our whole house/yard/property is where plant things go to die, but that’s another story for another day.

And so it was decided that I would create an eerie scene of cannibal dolls and the parts they left behind.

A scene of creepy cannibal baby dolls and bloody doll partsOf course, the best way to add even more creepiness is to use lighting. Our kitchen and family room were lit with a green glow that illuminated a lot of our home, but the babies needed something a little darker. So we put a red light above the sink to radiate around the dolls.

The green glow from the house and the red illumination from the light over the sink made these creepy baby dolls in kitchen window even worseThe green glow from the house and the red illumination from the light over the sink made these creepy baby dolls in kitchen window even worse than without the lighting. When we had people over last week, they were either horrified or impressed. I suppose that’s pretty normal.

What creepy things do you do for Halloween? What’s the most screwed-up thing you’ve done as a decoration? Would you make these creepy dolls or buy some of the zombie babies I showed you above?

Some links used in this post are affiliate links and will earn me a small commission so I can keep spending money on the important things…like Halloween decorations.

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And Now, A Post-Christmas Song/Poem.

So I wrote a song to commemorate my very sad day. Usually, I would postpone this shit as long as humanly possible, but I want to come home from FLORIDA to a clean house and nothing to do but vacation laundry and seashell projects.

Plus with another polar vortex/ice age/death cold coming in a few days, I’d rather just get this shit out of the way.

Packing up the Christmas tree

Half the ornaments are already off the tree…Now it’s time for those individual Hallmark boxes. FML.

The Christmas Alma Mater Song (to the tune of the Mickey Mouse Club Alma Mater Song, but shorter. Because I’m lazy.)

Now it’s time

To say goodbye

To all my Christmas trees.

They start with C

See ya real soon

There is no Y

Why? Because we like them.

Pa-cking up the trees.

Christmas trees

Mistletoe

Christmas trees

Mistletoe

Forever let us hold the garland high

High high high!

Come along and sing this song

That is melancholy.

Ornaments.

Christmas Lights.

Packing up the tree.

 

As you can see, my apartment is in shambles, so I best stop this blogging nonsense and get to it. Maybe later, if I get enough written incentive and booze, I’ll videotape my song for you.

 

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Confession Friday: I Don’t Have Time to Write! AKA I Spent My Time Carving Pumpkins

So you get pictures instead.

Pumpkin Carving 101…without direction… a photo shoot of model pumpkins

Pumpkins and Decorations Oh My!

Getting Ready for the Halloween Party!

The fist carved pumpkin

This one is going to have 3 little faces drawn on the small pumpkins and they will be on a skewer going into the big mouth

Carved Pumpkin 2

This one has little wrinkle lines that will shine through when lit…

Dog Watching Humans carve pumpkins

This is Dexter. He is thinking to himself, “Crazy fucking humans.”

More Pumpkin Carving

My work station

Carving Baby Pumpkins

Carving the Evil Piranha Pumpkins–not my best angle…

Dog watching humans carve pumpkins

“Stupid humans. That’s food.” (Right before he got up and started eating the innerts)

Attack of the Baby Pumpkins

My work of art. This year’s “Chrissy is sick and twisted” pumpkin. If there’s time, I’ll carve more crazy pumpkins!

baby Pumpkin piranhas

One more look at my work of art

More carved pumpkins

The work of my awesome roommates

Bad Ass Pumpkin

My roommate Anna’s work of art…This one drew blood. They say once a pumpkin tastes human blood…

Deep Sea Pumpkin

My other roommate’s pumpkin. This one is still in a process, it’s going to have a baby pumpkin hanging from the top like a deep sea fish.

 

Pumpkin Family

Family Photo…

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DIY: How to Make Your Own Halloween Decor AKA Some Seriously F*ed Up Sh*t

So, in case you didn’t already know… I’m pretty sick and twisted when it comes to Halloween. From Haunted House Costumes to Pinterest Gone Awesome with a Baby Eating Pumpkin, I’ve got some really messed up thoughts on the creepy. Last week, while perusing Pinterest for some ideas to decorate for the Halloween festivities at our house…I came across this pin:

Source: grandinroad.com via Chrissy on Pinterest

Source: grandinroad.com via Chrissy on Pinterest

First, I thought to myself, That is the coolest fucking thing I have ever seen. Then I realized, $33? Fuck that. I can make that bad ass piece of Halloween paraphernalia way cheaper.


So last night, I got the supplies together…(and spent a grand total of $8) and set out to create. My plan was: If this goes poorly, I will call the post: Pinterest Gone Wrong. If this goes well, I will call this post Some Seriously Fucked up Shit.

As you will soon see, I’m an evil genius.

The Materials the Make the Hanging Cocoon

The materials I started with: 2 long poles (I used a broomstick and a mop), a ball, a fitted bed sheet, a hanger, fake spider web, and plastic bugs.

I needed some tape, too. Luckily my boyfriend had duct tape in his car…

Duct Tape for Halloween Decoration

Yes. In his car. Creepy?

Hanging Cocoon Man for Halloween

Tape the hanger to the ball. The hanger is your “shoulders.”

How to Make the Coolest Halloween Decorations

Tape the poles to the hanger

Halloween Cocoon Man

Tape the poles together in the center

Making a Cocoon Man for Halloween

Cool, right?

It was at this point that I realized I needed a few additional supplies… 3 more hangers.

Cocoon Man Hips

The hips

Cocoon Man for Halloween

Reinforce the head

Hanging Cocoon Man

Add the Shoulders (2 additional hangers)

Halloween Mummy Decoration

Wrap the body like a mummy

Brian made a suggestion that we add a pillow to the body. Since we have a plethora of pillows…this seemed like a brilliant plan. So, I ran and got one.

The Hanging Mummy

Tape the pillow to the poles

Making a Hanging Mummy

Re-wrap the cocoon

Spider Web Wrapped Cocoon

Wrap the cocoon in spider webbing

Hanging the Corpse

Realized we needed something to hang…so my boyfriend had these in his car too…hmmmm….

Hanging Mummy

Hung the mummy

Adding to the Hanging Cocoon

We’re going to cover that entire area in spiderwebbing…Like so. And people will be scared. Like so.

Hanging Cocoon Man

Finishing Touches-the death bugs…not unlike Death Bug

Brian is terrified of this. He thinks I am completely sick and twisted. He is right.

I made a homemade hanging mummy cocoon wrapped in spider webs and hung it from the banister in the stairwell for our Halloween Party

What creepy-ass shit do you do for Halloween?

Shop New Halloween Decorations for 2015 via TrendyHalloween.com

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