First, Some Housekeeping. Then, a Shameless Plug with Video. And Perhaps Several Winners!

Greetings Blog Friends!

As promised…

Housekeeping

I apologize profusely for the MIA/broken blog. You may have been unable to comment…or you may have noticed a giant mess of code and error messages…

Just blame Brian. (Although, in his defense, he DID help troubleshoot my blog with the WinHost people. So we can’t be too angry at him…)

After a 48 hour blog blackout, we’re BACK IN BUSINESS. With LOTS to say. And a whole new plan for the coming year of bloggy bloggy joy.

Shameless Plug

My blog friend, Heather the B(itch), came out with her second book. When I say shameless, I mean it. This girl brings new meaning to the word, bitch. And I kind of adore her. So when she sent a call out for videos calling HER out as the bitch we all know and love her to be…I was in. The results? An amusing trailer in which I am pretty darn awesome.

In honor of Heather’s book release, I’ve created a Zazzle tee-shirt!

I feel bitchy tee shirt

 

You can order yours today to wear while reading Heather’s sassy pants book. If you’d prefer to order through me (with slightly different lettering), I’m working on another t-shirt option utilizing the bitchy song I came up with at work. (I have the best co-workers ever. Seriously.)

Winners!

What? I mentioned winners? Of course, I did! You think I forgot about my joyous giveaways last week? Nope, not this girl. So I used a completely random number generator to choose the winners (and by random number generator, I mean Brian. He told me a number, and then there was magically a winner. Except that I won like 3 times…so he had to tell me other numbers. And actually the first number he said was pi. And that OBVIOUSLY was wrong.)

Congratulations to the following big winners! I hope you like your prizes (even the random and ridiculous ones):

Monday’s Secret Amazon Winner is Charleen from Cheap Thrills Book Blog.

Congrats to Charleen for being the future owner of the following SWEET ASS Amazon prizes! (GO FORTH AND READ THE REVIEWS!)

Amazon Banana Slicer Amazon Strawberry Slicer

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Our next winner is for a beautiful coffee mug featuring Brian’s art. The piece on the mug is entitled, “Imagination Takes Flight.”Jessica from Red Hot Writing Hood is the winner of this sweet prize! Congrats Jessica!

Imagination Takes FlightOur next winner is for the Unbirthday Think Geek Gift Card! Joules from Pocketful of Joules will get to enjoy all of the geeky stuff she wants (that is available for $25 or less). Well played Joules!

And the last winner of the birthday/bloggiversary week giveaways is April from First Time Mom and Dad! Congrats to April who will be receiving a sweet ass surprise (that’s just too good to giveaway the details before she receives it!)

(Winners, drop me an e-mail with your info so that I can get your lovely prizes out to you!)

Thank you to everyone who entered the giveaways last week and to all of you who read the posts I throw out into the world. I’ve got some great summer product reviews coming up in the near future, and maybe there will be a few more giveaways to come.

Blog Friends, what do you want to see more of on this little blog of mine?

Hey! Did you know you can buy my book on Amazon? 37 women wrote about the struggle for perfection, and I'm one of 'em. Go check it out!

When Hate Happens (I Probably Shouldn’t Write About This)

I try really hard to be a mostly positive person. Sure, I bitch about shit. Life’s life, guys. Shit happens. Bitching happens. And Hate. Hate unfortunately happens. Not my hate, though…someone else’s hate was spewed on me. Just like that one time I got hate mail from MySpace. And so my dear friends I am offering you a piece of my past.

I Used to be a Waitress Server

I grew up in a bar, so it wasn’t unusual that I found myself working in restaurants and bars whenever I wasn’t working a full-time job. For about 6 months, I worked as a waitress an Irish pub (you know, the dark wood, make the servers wear kilts and knee highs kinda place).

But at the same time. After that job, I swore that I would never be a waitress again.

I’m going to give you a little glimpse into the why.

One afternoon, two very unhappy looking ladies entered the bar and sat in my section. They ordered chips, soup and salad. No beer. No booze. And no smiling.

So I tried to be my chipper cheery self.

Unfortunately, they also got to meet my super klutzy self. As I was clearing their plates away (and God forbid they should have attempted to move out of the way just a smidge so that I could easily access the empty plates that they wanted removed…), I accidentally tipped the dressing boat/ramekin and some spilled out. Most of it went to the floor, and a few drops landed on this girl’s winter coat. I rushed to clean the mess, and apologized profusely, but I was met with disdain. Disdain for me being a lowly server. Disdain for my MASSIVE life altering error. Disdain for me as a human being. And I apologized. And this girl glared at me. And I offered to pay for the coat to be cleaned, because God forbid you spill anything on an old-looking, dark colored coat…

She paid the bill, and forgot to leave me a tip. I’m going to assume she forgot. I mean, she must not have realized that servers get paid like $4/hour if they’re lucky.

Seriously guys, I’ve spilled ice cream on bridesmaids that were nicer to me than this girl was. I went home and cried.

A few weeks later, my boss came to me with the following (on which I’ve blacked parts out to protect the guilty.)

Bitchy Waitress

Bitchy Waitress

The dry cleaning cost more than the bill she stiffed me on.

If you’re wondering whether I sent her the check? I did. A few weeks afterwards…I wasn’t making a whole lot of money at said bar…I didn’t think she was that desperate for the $20 based on the fact that she spends $20 to dry-clean one item…

Unfortunately for this girl, the check was returned to me about 3 weeks after I retired from waiting tables. Apparently, she gave me the wrong address.

I didn’t think it was necessary to seek her out.

For the record, guys…ALWAYS be nice to your servers. The Golden Rule ALWAYS applies. Even when it’s lowly, bitchy waitresses. Because one day, she might be almost famous and tell the story about how you were mean that one time.

Were you ever a server? Bartender? Anything in the service industry? Dealing with people sucks, amiright? Tell me your story!

 

Hey! Did you know you can buy my book on Amazon? 37 women wrote about the struggle for perfection, and I'm one of 'em. Go check it out!