Peace Out, My Bitches…This Girl’s Headed South for the Next Polar Vortex.

I hear there’s another Polar Vortex thing happenng in the Chi. Fuck that.

I’m on vacation until further notice. Or this weekend. One of those.

Quirky Chrissy at the beach

On Saturday, Brian and I jetted out of town to Marco Island to visit his dad and my dolphin brethren. (BTW, I’m totally writing this shit ON the plane. $8 to write you a blog post and play Simpson’s Tapped Out for the last time until next weekend seemed worth it.)

After waiting in an hour long TSA line, we made our way to the gate JUST in time to send a few instagram pictures for your viewing pleasure and slam and airport breakfast sandwich.

So, in the long wait in line, I found myself encouraging other people who were running SERIOUSLY late for their flight to cut their way to the front. This sweet elderly couple was the only pair that took me up on it, and I was glad for them, because it looked like they were barely going to make their flight.The best part was when the woman looked at me and said, “Well, if anyone gives me trouble, I’ll just pull the old lady card.”

I fucking love old people. I can’t wait to use the old lady card! I’m going to be so inappropriate.

Anyways, it reminded me of the mad dash I had on my way to NOLA in 2010 when the Drug Addict, who was driving my friend, brother and I to the airport made us ridiculously late for our flight. We literally had to do the Home Alone run through the airport, begging for passage through the long-ass TSA line. My friend wanted to kill me, and I wanted to kill the Drug Addict.

This time, the Chicago weather was to blame. Apparently flights were cancelled on Friday night, so everyone was trying to get through security at the same time. Total clusterfuck.

Marco Island Florida

Well, Blog Friends, have a wonderful week! I’ll try to check up on comments and make a video blog post to say hello from Florida.  I’m taking requests. What do you want to see in Southwest Florida?

Hey! Did you know you can buy my book on Amazon? 37 women wrote about the struggle for perfection, and I'm one of 'em. Go check it out!
In Which Uncle Murphy Paid a Visit to the Girl Who Won’t Stop Bragging About Vacation…Which Starts Tomorrow. Things I’ve Learned on Vacation…Mid-Vacay Edition

Comments

  1. “What do you want to see in Southwest Florida?”

    Gators modeling swimsuits. AAAAaaand GO!

  2. JoulesDellinger says:

    The hottest guy you can find. I want the six-pack, tattoos and everything. And you can say it was totally my fault if you get in trouble. SEE, I”m already a bad old lady!

  3. Every beach has “that guy.” You’ll know him when you see him. I want to see him and maybe a great woman in a two piece suit to remind my wife how fun vacation is and that we need to start saving if we plan on going.

  4. The sunset and your giant um…chest was enough for me. Maybe a great pic of you and Brian and a palm tree.
    It’s only -4 degrees, no biggie…it’s CHICAGO.
    love u

  5. Dolphins!!

  6. Dude. Your rack is insane! I want to see beachy oceany goodness!

  7. Have tons of fun in Florida. We’re crazy down here, but at least we have great weather.

  8. Definitely dolphins. Have a great time. I’ll be in Orlando later this week. 80 degrees here I come!!

  9. You had me at dolphins, Chrissy! Yes, I heard the Mid-West and East is going to get another swing of the bat by Mother Nature or I guess currently is. I literally saw this story about dolphins about an hour ago on Yahoo. You’ll like it 🙂 About a dolphin whisperer. http://bit.ly/1jD8sR9

  10. Boo, I’m jealous of the warmth you are seeking. Requests for the video? Awkward people.

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