Archives for May 2013

525,600 Minutes. It’s my Bloggiversary Golden Birthday! (And a Giveaway!)

I woke up at 5:30 this morning. On 5/30. My 30th birthday. My golden birthday. And my bloggiversary. Almost 530,000 minutes of my life have happened in the lifetime of this blog. And that’s pretty darn awesome.

birthday dessert

Yes, Blog Friends, That is CHEESE in my dessert. Spring Fed Goat Cheese with Angel Food Cake and Pistachio Ice Cream. Holy Happiness Batman.

So, How Do You Measure a Year?

  • 266 published posts?
  • Stats in general?
  • Love?
  • Cups of coffee?
  • Days employed?
  • Friendships?
  • Laughs?
  • Nerd moments?
Doctor Who Sonic Screwdriver

The sonic screwdriver I received as an early birthday present from Brian

Doctor Who Sonic Screwdriver Doctor Who Sonic Screwdriver

 

 

 

I could list the amazing things and people that have been a part of my life over the course of the last year since my first official blog post. To call it a journey seems silly, but that is exactly what I’ve had. A journey. Personally. Professionally. Emotionally. Physically. I have walked a thousand miles in my own shoes, and I have a year of blogging/reflecting to prove it. And I’m not done yet.

Because of YOU though, it’s been a very unique journey. One that only a blogger would understand. I’ve made friends around the world. I’ve shared personal stories. I’ve become a better writer because I read your writing. And you inspire me.

So today, I’m asking that when you comment on the blog, you share your own work. If you’re not a blogger or an artist, tell me something about yourself. And in return, as a glorious reward, we’ll have not one, but TWO giveaways. (And the Amazon Surprise Giveaway & Zazzle Giveaway are still open for your commenting–All of this week’s giveaways will run until Monday, June 3).

Mark Poulin Sloth necklace

A SLOTH necklace I received for my birthday! Our lovely friend Ava found this little guy on the interwebs from Mark Poulin, so I had to share his site with you.

Mark Poulin Sloth necklace

A Very Merry UnBirthday to YOU!

So it’s my birthday, but you’re going to get some UNbirthday presents!

Giveaway #3

The winner of giveaway #3 will win a $25 ThinkGeek gift card because nerdy things abound here at Quirky Chrissy. Just comment below to receive an entry.

Giveaway #4

Sharing is caring. For social shares (Twitter, Facebook, Etc), you can win this prize (but you have to tag Quirky Chrissy on Facebook or @Chrissawoj on Twitter. Because I need to see the post, kids). Top secret amazing prize here.

Blog Friends, how do YOU measure a year?

 

Hey! Did you know you can buy my book on Amazon? 37 women wrote about the struggle for perfection, and I'm one of 'em. Go check it out!

My Boyfriend…the Artist

You guys.

I’m starting a Zazzle store. This has been in the works for a while now…but Brian has finally agreed to share something with you. His art.

Yep. His. Art. He has art.

Without further ado, or a whole lot of rambling…I give you a whole lot of awesome.

Art of Brian Moran Art of Brian Moran Art of Brian Moran Art of Brian Moran Art of Brian Moran

Birthday Giveaway #2

If you didn’t catch yesterday’s surprise giveaway (which will run until tomorrow morning), you should go check it out. Plus you get the story of my birth, from, you know…my mom. Today, a random commenter will receive the very first Brian Moran original art coffee mug. Choose the piece that you like best from the pieces above (oh and tell me what you like about it!), and the coffee mug could be yours. As always, sharing is caring…and people who share get bonus entries.

Hey! Did you know you can buy my book on Amazon? 37 women wrote about the struggle for perfection, and I'm one of 'em. Go check it out!

I Was Born on Memorial Day

I wanted to tell you the story of my birth, but even my near idydic memory isn’t that good. So I enlisted the help of someone who would know better than anyone else.

Blog Friends, meet Mom. Mom, meet the Blogosphere. (I’ve taken the liberty of adding my own two cents in pink).

Chrissy and Mom

This is my mom and I at the White Sox game a few weeks ago.

Well, I was awakened by my daughter this morning at 9:11am to write a blog post…which she’s wanted to do for a while. Oh, if only 30 years ago today it had been so easy. You see, she was born on Memorial Day. Although, it was actually May 30th, it was Monday, Memorial Day, 1983.

None of our friends had children. For the past 5 months or so, I had been their slave. I was the designated driver everywhere (hmm that still has not changed). I was very sick of the drunk people, especially my sister and my husband! So the Sunday night before Memorial Day was party time. At our apartment. Larry (Chrissy’s dad), Susan (my sister) and her then-husband, Jay, had me making drinks all night…until 1 AM! I kept complaining my back hurt and they called me a baby.

After falling asleep for a couple of hours, I awoke to a leaking water (and some other stuff that Chrissy edited out). I was thrilled!!! She’s coming! Christine Regina! The enjoyment of waking up my husband was twofold. Number one I wanted to get to the hospital and see her as quickly as possible. Number two, I knew he was still drunk! Hello payback!

I was calm and collected for the next few hours. My father-in-law arrived to witness, or at least be there for her joyous moment into this world. Yeah, well…that didn’t happen.

Hours went by, and still, no Chrissy. After 8hrs I was still only dilated to 1. At 12 PM, they decided it was time for Pitocin to move the LABOR along. After several hours of this nonsense, and much screaming involved, a nice shot of Demerol may help. GO FOR IT!! A few hours later, still no success and no doctor. You see he had a feeling I was going to need a C-Section, and went home to sleep for a few hours. I was positive that I was dying. My father-in-law went home. My parents and family were told we would call them.

The doctor came back and ordered an X-ray of my pelvis. NOW??? It was 10pm!! And I had been on Pitocin for 10 hours!!! Now an X-ray?

Showing that it would be very doubtful Chrissy would be able to come through my tiny body. (I would kill to be as TINY now, 9 mos and 3 days pregnant I was still 60lbs less than today). At this point, I had been screaming for hours. Loud, piercing screams. NO offense to Chrissy, but I was yelling things like…”Get this fucking thing out of me!!!” That’s not very nice, Mom. The doctor was furious with me. I was scaring all of the other mothers..the ones who had not been in labor for 20 and 1/2 hours and on Pitocin for nearly 12 hours.

Ay 11pm I was prepped for the c-section and as soon as that needle went into my spine, I was like “THANK YOU!” Numbness was good…no pain. Ahhh…where’s my baby!!! I was awake for her birth, but could not see. Larry could not watch it. he had been drunk and happy when it all began. He was now tired beyond measure (poor baby), hungover, and had stood by my side for nearly the entire 20 1/2 hours of labor. Good things take time. He had to wait to see her. She was perfect! Of course, I was.

Aside from the very pointed head, Hey! Who you calling pointy? because she had tried nonstop to come out, I thought she was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. Happy almost birthday, darling…I love you.

P.S. 10 months and 2 days later, her brother Brian was born. The doctor looked at me after his birth and said…Are you going to listen to me now? I did. Ew.

You guys, I love this story, because my dad was all hammered and had to suck it up and deal with it. And then I took my sweet, sweet time. So I knew I had to share it with you.

Blog Friends, I know a lot of you are moms. Were your kids as much of a pain in the ass as me?

Hey! Did you know you can buy my book on Amazon? 37 women wrote about the struggle for perfection, and I'm one of 'em. Go check it out!

Confession Friday: I Love Myself

A short post but the truest of genuine posts that could possibly be.

I don’t want to sound cocky or anything…but sometimes…I totally think I’m awesome. Even when I’m not.

I have this thing for liking my own blog posts. And Facebook statuses. And tweets. And anything else that I could possibly like that belongs to me.

It’s not even a stats game.

Because I stopped obsessing over the stats.

I’ve got a friend who likes every comment she makes or posts on Facebook. And I admire that in a person. I mean, if you say it, you should like it right?

And I recently realized that no matter how much shit does not go the way you want it to or expect it to…

If you love your life, you should live your life and not worry about the things that haven’t happened yet or the things that you can’t change.

So I decided that I’m going to love my life. And my blog posts.

Twitter Likes Blog Post Likes

 

 

 

 

What can I say?

I’m a sucker for liking myself.

I like my own posts

 

What about you, Blog Friends? Do you like your own posts? Tweets? Do you think it’s ridiculous that I like mine…publicly?

Hey! Did you know you can buy my book on Amazon? 37 women wrote about the struggle for perfection, and I'm one of 'em. Go check it out!

No Really, I’m Going to be 30…And I Need Your Help.

So I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this or not…but I’m going to be 30. In one week. After my golden birthday comes and goes, I will return to 29. And stay there. Forever.

In all reality, I’m much less panicked than I was upon turning 25. That was a very strange time in my life. I was dating someone who’s oldest child was closer in age to me than he was (you know, just in the opposite direction). I was spending most of my free time drinking or bartending (I had a full time gig as a catering manager). And I was terrified. 25 scared me. Even though I said that 30 was my scary age, 25 was right there. Waiting for me. With that whole quarter-life crisis thing.

But 25 came and went. And I survived. And I know that I’ll survive this one too. I’ll get by with a little help from my friends.

Get to the point, Chrissy…

The point is this: I’ve already done so much. And there’s so much more life to live. I’m creating a bucket list for 40. 10 years. 40 things. And it’s going to be spectacular.

But I’ve also got another plan. Thanks to my word worm, Katie, I have become a Twitter fiend. Sometimes, I tweet along with Grey’s Anatomy. Sometimes I tweet at famous people, hoping that they’ll love me and respond. And one time. No. Two times, Blessid Union of Souls retweeted me. Because they are awesome. And the Bloggess offered to share her Bloggie award with me. Because she is the most awesome ever.

TheBloggess (TheBloggess) on Twitter 2013-05-22 22-54-19And in true Bloggess fashion, I think it it would be fun to try to get some famous people to tell me “Happy Birthday.” Or “Go Fuck Yourself”. Or “Dude. Hi.” I’m not really picky what they say to me. I just think it would be cool to see how many famous people I can get to acknowledge my existence.

We all know what a fool I am when I meet famous people in real life. I have a much better chance of remaining calm digitally. So help me out. Send a famous tweeter or two my Twitter handle (@chrissawoj) and tell them that it would be fantastic if they could send me a little love over the next week. Pictures. Videos. Tweets. All seem like brilliant ideas. Because I’m pushing 30 and dammit I want to ring it in. In the best way possible.

Blog friends, who would you want to tweet at you on your birthday? Please tell me it’s someone awesome.

Hey! Did you know you can buy my book on Amazon? 37 women wrote about the struggle for perfection, and I'm one of 'em. Go check it out!

When in Doubt, Ask for Help and DON’T Back Out of the Parking Garage

So, you may have noticed that I’ve been slacking on the awesome recently. I mean…I shared an e-mail from my boyfriend, a ridiculous picture of myself, and a ranty rant about dress codes last week.  I was beginning to think that I was losing my touch.

But then…Like magic…All of a sudden out of nowhere I have 15 new stories to tell you. But today I will only tell you one. Because I have to save some of this goodness for a rainy day. Or a brain block day. Or a writer’s block day. Or my memoirs. One of those.

So today I’m going to tell you about last night’s adventure.

I met up with a girlfriend of mine for dinner after work. We had a general location in mind, but not an actual restaurant. We were off to Rosemont (a mere blocks away from O’Hare, where I briefly daydreamed of jumping on a plane to New Orleans.) I arrived with the intentions of finding a place for us to dine, and then I would tell her where to meet me. Really, guys, this SEEMED like a logical plan. Considering I didn’t know the area all that well and everything in the area on Yelp seemed super pricy.

Finally, I made my way to an area I used to sort of know a little bit. There was a movie theater and a parking garage the last time I was there, but now it’s full of restaurants and such. Fab! I thought. We’ll eat at one of these places. So I pulled into the parking garage without a second thought.

Until I got to the second level. $13? That’s fucking crazy. But there were 3 lanes. One didn’t have a ticket dispenser. So I followed that one to the third level. Where I was met with a ticket dispenser. $13? Fuck that shit. Fuck that a lot.™

Except that there was a sign that read, “No refunds.”

So what’s a girl to do when she’s on the 3rd level of a very coned off area of a parking garage?

Back the fuck up.

Literally. I backed up. All the way down around the corner to the second level. Then I inched my way toward the original ramp…the one lane, steep-as-shit, one way ramp.

And some cars starting to come up, so I pulled forward a bit to let them through.

When it looked all clear, I thought…OK. Let’s do this thing. And I started backing down slowly on the ramp. Until a car starting pulling up. SHIT! I put the car back into drive and maneuvered my way back up to the second level. I pulled far enough out of the way to let the guy through, but he must have seen my distressed look, so he rolled down his window to get my attention.

And I looked over and this teenage boy, who couldn’t have been more than 19 looks at me with pity and asks if I need help. I told him my dilemma (not that I had backed down from the 3rd level though. That shit was embarrassing) and he said that I just needed to take a ticket and pull through to the exit. What the what? Really? Why didn’t I think of that? And then he told me to double check with the guy in charge by pushing the…wait for it…HELP button.

After following both sets of instructions and confirming that I wouldn’t get charged by the annoyed parking garage guy who answered my call for help…I made my way safely out of the parking lot and into a free parking space.

And for the record, guys, my pal had equally as much difficulty getting to the restaurant…As she past the correct exit, got off the interstate too far north, and kept driving north until I asked her whether the sun was on her left or right and then insisted she turn around immediately.

But we had a delightful meal and a really cool Irish pub. And then I almost accidentally went back into the parking garage. I swear I’m not a complete flake. Usually.

 

Hey! Did you know you can buy my book on Amazon? 37 women wrote about the struggle for perfection, and I'm one of 'em. Go check it out!

In Which My Boyfriend Is “Cooler” Than Your Boyfriend

I, along with a couple of our friends received the following e-mail last week.

From my boyfriend.

Yes, yes…He IS sometimes more creative than me. One day, I’ll show you the first e-mail he ever sent me. Maybe.

<knock><knock>
 
Good, you’re all here.
It was getting pretty late and the night watch has a price on all of our heads. Yes, Yes… BananaMan… the price on your head is still the highest. What? No! We have to continue using our code-names so they can’t track us down. Did you bring the map?
 
The Map
 
Good… good…. wait! No… that’s USELESS, BananaMan! Get your head in the game! That’s a map of the whole city. We need more specific intel about our targets.
 
NaughtyNurse, what kind of information did you get from the guards you cavorted with last night?
 
Gen Con Website
 
That’s better! Good job NaughtyNurse!
 
Gen Con Hotel Info
 
Hmmm…. Yes… we’ll need to regroup near the target but our “Investor” has backed out. We’ll have to fund this operation on our own, but I think the payout may be well worth the investment.
 
What’s that? No! You CAN’T change your codename to “QuirkyChrissy”, CheeseWiz. Yes…. yes… we all know how much you hate cheese-wiz… you’ve been complaining about it ever since you were assigned that code-name… you KNOW its short for “Cheese Wizard”. Fine… Fine. Ok.ok.ok.ok…. pick another type of cheese then.
 
OK.
 
Oh. you have some scouting information for our basecamp? You think that close proximity to the target may be expensive and that one of your “contacts” may be able to stash us away for the duration of the caper? Do you trust them, though?
 
Travel Site 1
 
Travel Site 2
 
Well… that’s a start at least.
What? No I didn’t actually have an assignment.
I’m the team leader!
What?
No. No one voted for me…. well, see, there was this chick in a lake that handed me a sword…
 

But…you’re probably asking yourself…WHAT does it all mean?

We’ll be spending the entire 4 glorious gaming days in August at Gen Con. At a hotel that doesn’t have bedbugs. AND I need a new code name.

Pictures from Gen Con 2012.

Gen Con Gen Con Gen Con

I’ve got LOTS of questions for you guys!

So what should my code name be? Do you go to any cons? Which one(s)? Would you participate in Cos-play (dressing up in nerdy costumes at conventions)? Should I? I’m thinking about live blogging while I’m there. What are your thoughts on that?

Hey! Did you know you can buy my book on Amazon? 37 women wrote about the struggle for perfection, and I'm one of 'em. Go check it out!

I Am…Among Other Things…A Fashion Maven…Maybe.

Work to Weekend Style

Hey! Did you know you can buy my book on Amazon? 37 women wrote about the struggle for perfection, and I'm one of 'em. Go check it out!

Monday Memories: Dress Code Discrimination?

I read about this controversial dress code from Delightfully Ludicrous and I just knew that a rant had to happen.

So I thought I could make it more fun by offering you my very own dress code story and incorporating it into Monday Memories.

Monday Memories

So today, friends, Monday Memories is all about dress codes.

First and foremost, I want to state for the record that it’s a sad sad state of things when the dress code of a child in kindergarten is considered compromised. The fact that it needs to exist at all? Baffling.

I got in trouble in grade school for wearing a tee-shirt featuring Spuds McKenzie, because it represented beer.

But never in a million years would my mother have let me out of the house in a freaking push up bra at 7. Or a thong. A freakin’ thong. I see younger and younger girls at Victoria’s Secret every time I stop in. (Which is a lot, because I have an obsession. And it’s not with their underwear. Yoga pants. Yoga crops. Yoga leggings. Yoga shorts.) But these little girls are buying thongs.

I STILL don’t like thongs.

So back to dress codes. After watching the news clip of the little girl who got in trouble for wearing a hello kitty outfit with a skort and tights (for the skort being “too short”), I was appalled. And annoyed. Because school administrators are very picky about who has to turn their shirts inside out, who has to wear their gym clothes, who has to be sent home. I feel like they may have discriminated against this girl. Not necessarily because of her race, but for anything. Maybe the school didn’t like the way her mother dressed. Maybe the school admins didn’t like the mother. I don’t know, but I don’t like it.

It happened to me once in high school. Because I was the chubby girl. Now in high school, I wasn’t fat. But I was bigger than a lot of the other girls. One of my favorite go-to warm-weather clothing items (when I wasn’t wearing pajamas to school-which I did a lot) was a tube top and overall shorts. I know. Classy. But I liked it. I thought I looked nice. My mom thought I looked nice. The overalls had straps that fit the school’s dress code criteria and lots of girls dressed that way. It wasn’t revealing. At all.

But one day I got pulled to the side by an administrator who politely informed me that it was gym shirt or get sent home. I had a sweatshirt in my locker that I was able to throw over my outfit (though I was sweltering) and I made it through the day. She was discriminating against me, because I was the chubby girl with boobs. She basically told me it was because girls with chests shouldn’t wear clothing like I was wearing. There wasn’t even cleavage showing (well, not any more than the skinny girls showed, anyways).

dress code discrimination

This was not the set in question. This was actually MORE revealing than the one that got me in trouble. I wore this on the last week of school as a “Fuck You” to the administrator who called me out the first time. Guess what? No one said a word. So they pick and choose their battles.

I was pissed, but I survived. And fortunately so will the little girl in her Hello Kitty cuteness. Let’s just hope she doesn’t start shopping and A&F or Victoria’s Secret for bras and thongs next year when she’s 7.

Go visit Lily at It’s a Dome Life for more dress code memories!

So what about you guys? Ever felt like someone in charge was calling you out because you were different?

 

Hey! Did you know you can buy my book on Amazon? 37 women wrote about the struggle for perfection, and I'm one of 'em. Go check it out!

30 Things Before Thirty: Looking Back

I’m. Going. To. Be. 30.

Soon.

I never created a 30 before 30 list. But you know what? I’ve done a lot of cool shit in my almost 30 years.

I was planning on posting this 30 days before my GOLDEN 30th birthday on May 30th, but things don’t always work out the way they are planned and that’s okay.

I’ve decided to write a list of 30 things that would have been on my 30 before 30 list, if I had made one…Of course these are the things that I have obviously already  completed (or will complete) before the big day.

(Side note: I am well aware that somewhere halfway through the list, I switch tenses. Just go with it, because I’m too tired to fix it.)

The Bucket List I Never Knew I Already Mastered

1. Get credit debt free. (OK, this one will be officially completed contingent upon my next paycheck, but still. CREDIT. DEBT. FREE. Like a motherfucking boss.)

2. Fire drill in a skyscraper. Hell yes, bitches. (Okay, it’s a shortie but still anything more than 10 floors is still super tall!) Did you know that when they have a fire drill in a big fancy tall building, they don’t make you practice going ALL THE WAY down the stairs? Me neither. But I do now.

3. Experience the glory of New Orleans. Twice. I’ve been there pre and post Katrina…and it’s still my second favorite city of all the cities I’ve been to. (Chicago is obvi #1.) (And Disney doesn’t count as a city, PEOPLE. It’s a magical land of joy.)

Speaking of Disney…

4. Visit Disney FIVE times. If I had my way, this would double (at least) before I’m 40, but let’s not push our luck.

5. Find a sand dollar on the beach. Or fifty?

Find a Sand Dollar Find a Sand Dollar

6. Travel out of the country. Yep. Katie and I went to London in 2004 (And yes, my passport is about to expire). And it was amazing.

Tower of London

At the Tower of London

7. Get bullied into snuggling a giant albino snake. 

Cuddle a giant albino snake

7. Become a professional writer. Mama always told me that I should write, because that is where my true talent lies. I’ll never look back. (Well you know what I mean.)

8. Graduate from college. You guys, I was the first person in my familial line to go to college and graduate from a 4 year university. A first generation college graduate. How cool is that?

9. Meet Jenny Lawson. It was totally awesome to meet an author that I admire…even if I did make an ass of myself.

10. See Stonehenge. I’m not going to lie, guys…It was just a pile of rocks. I was hung over and it was just. a pile. of rocks.

Stonehenge is just a pile of rocks.11. Eat the most ridiculous animal meat that you can. A shortened list of the exotic and strange animals that I’ve eaten include: Kangaroo (yum!), Rattlesnake (meh), Raccoon (tastes like it eats my garbage), Antelope (delicious!), and possibly lion (I prefer vegetarian animals, I think.)

12. Take a train across the country. Sort of. We traveled from Chicago to Denver and it was not as awesome as one would think. Of course, we weren’t in a sleeper car either, so that may have made it less awesome.

13. Make a cameo on national television. Twice. In 2008, I went to a Sox game in scout seating, thanks to one of my dear friends. I was wasted and prancing around behind home plate like an asshole. I even made a point to yell over to Ozzie just to say hi. He waved back, but didn’t look happy. He probably didn’t remember meeting me when I was 8.

14. Hold the position of president in an organization. Guys, this is hard work. They told me it would be the best year of my life and the worst…Add in student teaching and that was the hardest year of my life.

15. Be recognized and awarded on a national level. The same organization that I was president of was also the organization that I was named a National Outstanding Vice President for the prior year. It was kind of amazing.

16. Change careers. As tough as this may be, the experience alone is worth it. I never thought that I could be where I am right now, and I wouldn’t change any of it for the world.

17.Become a godmother. The day my godson was born, was one of the happiest days ever. Having the honor of being his godmother, though? Joy forever. I truly have the best godson in the world.

18. Fall in love.

19. Have my heart broken.

20. Found Brian.

21. Get a tattoo.

Irish Twin Tattoos

The Irish Claddagh symbolizes friendship, loyalty, and love. Cupla is Gaelic for twins.

22. Received a Christmas card from out of the country! Thanks to my Canadian pal, Ash!

23. Hit over 1,000 Facebook Likes on my page!

24. I got to see wild dolphins.

25. Went to Westminster Abbey. Drunk.

26. Met a blogger in real life. (Lauren Filing Jointly is AMAZING.)

27. Took a grown up trip to Disney World. I can put Disney on my completed bucket list twice. Hell I could do it three times if I wanted to.

28. Went dancing at Disney World with the best boyfriend in the whole world after the most amazing meal of my life. See. I told you I could do it.

29. Went to the midnight showings and book releases of the last two Harry Potter books/three movies I didn’t really get crazy into them until those last few were coming out. Then I was obsessed.

30. Write a consistent blog for a year. As of May 30, friends…this one is done too! I never could have imagined then where this blog would be now. It’s because of you that I am still here. Thank you.

What’s on your I-already-did-that Bucket List, Blog Friends? What’s on your To-do Bucket List?

 

Hey! Did you know you can buy my book on Amazon? 37 women wrote about the struggle for perfection, and I'm one of 'em. Go check it out!