Monday Memories: Because That Holiday is TOTALLY Stupid Anyway

So this is the only peep you’re going to hear from me on the subject of that Hallmark holiday couples everywhere waste money on and singletons everywhere cry into their beer. As the theme for this morning’s Monday Memories is LOOOOOOOOVE, I thought I’d tell you about the one time before Brian that I had a “Valentine.”

I was in college and dating the Ethiopian. (We had already broken up and gotten back together once, as I spent 2 weeks in London and he missed me and blah blah blah). So we had been back together for a couple of weeks when the VD rolled into town. Neither of us had really ever done anything for it…so I planned some stupid shmoopy crap and cooked dinner. I won’t tell you about the shmoopy crap (because I’m totally embarrassed for myself that it involved a scavenger hunt…), but I will tell you that dinner involved a bottle of champagne. That I drank. By myself. The Ethiopian enjoyed a bottle of PBR, and I enjoyed a bottle of Korbel.

After dinner, his single buddy called to say he was at the bar. I told the Ethiopian to head over there, I wanted to clean the kitchen first, and I would meet him there.

He left, and I immediately went down to the bedroom for a “nap.” An hour later, I saw that he was calling my cell, but I was groggy (read: drunk on champagne and passed the fuck out) and opted not to answer. I fell back asleep and woke up at 4 AM to discover that he had called me like 5 times, leaving messages as to which bar to find him at each time. And that he was home. Whoops! Guess I slept through the evening’s festivities. And I didn’t really feel all that bad. And neither did he. So I guess when we broke up (again) a few weeks later, it shouldn’t have been that much of a surprise.

Join me and my pals as we write memories to make you laugh. If you’d like to get involved, next week’s theme is FOOD!

Monday Memories

 

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Remember How You Think I’m a Little Crazy? This One Isn’t Just About Me… The Crimson Thread or How Rumpelstiltskin Became the Good Guy

Comments

  1. It's A Dome Life says:

    A nap on Valentine’s Day sounds perfect…lol!

    I bet your scavenger hunt was actually awesome.

  2. “because Iā€™m totally embarrassed for myself that it involved a scavenger hunt” LOL. You had much more gumption for VD activities than I ever had.

  3. LOL am I the only one that read VD and thought the other VD? And then went “Ohhhhhhhhhhh…….Valentine’s Day” O_o

  4. All I want for Valentine’s Day is a long champagne-fueled nap. Is that so much to ask?

  5. Just when I thought I was finished laughing I read the comments! Ill pass on the Clap but ill take the long Bubbly induced nap. Scavenger hunt!!! I did that shit too. Once. For a birthday. Only I wasn’t smart enough to drink a bottle of champagne to drown the dumb.

    • LOL. Dude. I’m telling you, champagne is what gets me through life. Dumbass scavenger hunt? Champagne. First Christmas after my grandpa passed away? Champagne. New Year’s Eve that (MORE THAN ONE) boyfriend didn’t want to spend with me? Champagne. Random boring Saturday night? Champagne. That shit is the cure-all.

  6. Korbel! Yum! Ps. Got your package and I think it’s awesome! Thank you!!! Will be posting about it soon! =) xoxo

Trackbacks

  1. […] Check out Quirky Chrissy (Mastermind of Monday Memories – AKA as her first step towards world domination): Monday Memories Because THAT Holiday Is Totally Stupid. […]

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